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Disappointment in friendships

A theme I see frequently in my sessions with clients is disappointment in friendships/ relationships.

I hear countless stories from individuals in emotional pain who have been let down by friends at crucial times in their lives. Maybe one time. Maybe many times.

Individuals often experience this ‘let down’ as a deep hurt. A profound shame. Shame that their friend didn’t care to think of them. Shame that they had put more effort in than the other person. Shame that someone they thought highly of and invested in, just couldn’t be bothered to make the effort for them.

Many clients I see are in pain. In shock even. Confused by their one-sided friendships. It is in therapy where these individuals slowly put together the pieces, express their heartache and learn what a healthy friendship or relationship looks like. They learn who they have been attracted to in the past, and how to find healthier companions who will respect them moving forward.

Clients will often explore their values in sessions and learn how to make new friends/ form new relationships with likeminded people who value them equally. And put in the effort. After processing the grief, shame and confusion of an unhealthy friendship, clients often become empowered, learn how to communicate assertively and have their emotional needs met.

There is a time and a place to move on from unhelpful friendships and relationships. Why not today?

What does a healthy friendship look like to you?

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